Bible study without me, again

Hello and welcome,
I didn't make it to bible study today, so I'm going to do a bible study myself.
Matthew 5:38-48
This week's Gospel is especially difficult for me to put into practice.
As Fr Juan Carlos put it rather succinctly at 5p mass last night: you are to pray for those who hurt you, but not a prayer for them to go to Hell. A prayer for blessings and graces on them.
And I do pray for blessings and graces for those who hurt me, but I still want justice.  Lord, please help me with this failing of mine.
As I listened to Father's homily last night, I heard the Lord teaching me the same lesson he's been wanting me to learn for years.
I wasn't asking for God's grace to help me love my enemies. Once again, I think I can do better than God and just handle things myself.
Where can I begin to learn this lesson? That's the easy part. It's simple, and on-going.
I've got to keep releasing my will to God's; I must always return to God and ask for his grace.
Thank goodness God doesn't love like we love, and has such compassion and understanding for our behavior.
With his help, and only his help, am I able to do what's humanly impossible to do.

"I am a little pencil in the hand of a writing God who is sending a love letter to the world." Mother Theresa